Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Biting a stranger.

We came to this building first time couple of weeks ago. It is old solid factory building converted to offices. We climbed to the fourth floor since Sebastian s afraid of elevators. On the fourth floor the door from the staircase lead to long, bright carpeted L shaped corridor that runs through entire length and width of the building Sebastian was happy to run back and forth, and I felt since it was an enclosed space he was safe there. 'When we the time of our appointment came I was filling up the form Sebastian run outside of the office to the corridor again. I went out to get him, and saw that he took his pants off. It could indicate one only thing. When I get to him with the key to the toilet, he was more than half way done. Embarrassing. But we live in a zone where embarrassment must be ignored in order for our life to go on.

Today we were there again. I got the key to the bathroom right away, Sebastian used the toilet and things went smoothly before the appointment. Session was very stressful for Sebastian since it required him keeping still, and that id hard for him to do. When I was making another appointment Sebastian run out to the corridor. Since corridor was enclosed I thought he would be safe there for the minute I needed to finish. I was wrong. Very soon we were alarmed that Sebastian entered through the open door to another office, and bit somebody. Sebastian does not attack strangers, and tries to avoid contact with people if he can, but there were two occasions when he pulled a stranger hair. An yet this time I somehow new that something bad has happened. I was shocked, and all what I wanted to do is go home as quickly as we could. As a result I dad not apologize to satisfaction of the lady who was injured, and I had an email from her waiting for me at home that demanded satisfactory apology to be made and as made me relive and entire experience. I apologize.

The lady he did it to is an adult, but if Sebastian encountered a child the consequences could be much more traumatic. Sebastian is just six years old today, but if his behaviour will not improve dramatically it will soon be impossible for us two to go out together.

Will I ever hear an apology from people responsible for taking Sebastian's therapy away from him? I wander.

3 comments:

  1. she probably reinforced the biting by her reaction.

    Our therapist old us that once a kid hung off his arm with his teeth for over 20 minutes. I can tolerate biting on my arm without reacting too much (at least now when my kid is young), but I can't stand being hit or bit in the face and always react by leaving or some kind of emotional retort. In this world where people will often stab you just because your jacket brushed past their jacket, how can we expect that someone will tolerate that? There is nothing glamorous about autism, but a lot of the crap has to do with the disintegration of people's grasp over reality and self transcendence. With the majority of the population unable to tell their face from their ass, I do not expect anyone to even understand what these human qualities are.
    Don't be embarrassed, I know its hard not to, but when you have had more time to think about it Maryna, try to judge yourself and Sebastian from the eyes of God and not from the eyes of that lady or other people and you will no longer feel embarrassed. There is no guarantee you or I will even live past tomorrow so give him a hug and just try to live well.

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  2. Quite frankly I believe she is the one to owe you an apology. Why would you have to apologize to her satisfaction. Just the look of anxiety and stress on your face should have been enough for her. It is not like you told him to go do it! To harass you for an apology is just plain ignorant. Perhaps you should share her email with us so we can make her more aware of autism and how she should have reacted in the situation. I agree with Stranded. She most likely reinforced the situation and made it worse. Yep. She should apologize to you for her rudeness and ignorant assessment of the situation. Don't let people like her make you feel like you and Sebastian aren't welcome in society. She sounds like a bitch.

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  3. I am just going to guess here but maybe it could a response to pain.He is loosing his baby teeth.About this lady I don't know what to say , it takes all kinds to make the world go around. We have had our fair share of moments in public and I just bite my tongue(no pun intened) I use to carry cards around with me cause it would take alot of time explaining . How severe was the bite and did it break the skin. If you ever want me to assit you with appts please call me anytime. JP :)

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