Saturday, May 16, 2009

Allergies again.

Yesterday evening Sebastian's allergy medication I gave him in the morning must have worn off, as he was screaming, biting his hands and trying to pull my hair in the evening before the new dose started to work. He was letting me know that he was in pain. It must have been quite significant pain too, because I have seen him not even flinch after a big fall, and behave normally when his eyes look red and puffy like plums - he has quite high pain threshold.

I have a child who can not express his discomfort, pain, frustration or anxiety other than by aggression and self-injury. I can not explain to him what is going on, what is going to happen, that he is taking medication and that pain will go away soon. I can not reassure him other than by a big hug (in spite of him pulling my hair at the same time). In moments like this he seeks my presence, and screams in my face his pain and his confusion. Now it happens less frequently, and I have more patience and strength to take it. Just last year, it was an every day occurrence and could last for hours. I was at my wit's end.

Things are much better now.

(After writing this post I reflected on it briefly - Isn't aggression and self-injury how a lot of people react to pain and suffering? Physical and also psychological suffering for an extended period may cause people to cope by becoming self medicating addicts, becoming suicidal, abusive, or exploding and "going postal". These are all forms of self-aggression or aggression. So what Sebastian is doing is just smaller a scale typical reaction to a painful situation he has no understanding or control over.)

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